SAFE AS F*CK: Goldie Looking Chain Play Blackwood

GLC Rock da 'Stute

Tonight, Newport’s finest, GLC, played Blackwood Miners Institute, and what a CHAVtastic night it was; sorted, safe, tidy, you knows it like.

For those that don’t know, GLC are hip-hop’s answer to The Wurzels. As with all rap, they sing about what they know about, drugs, sex, making dodgy insurance claims, Newport and.. erm, drugs and sex! If that sounds bad, imagine it all being done with dreadful ‘Port accent and lyrics like “Your better off smoking the green instead, it don’t blim burn and it’s better for your head.” And “Guns don’t kill people, rappers do, I seen it on a documentary on BBC2”. It is all dreadfully cheesy and done with ultra straight faces; musically they are ok, nothing special, but when listening you can only vary from grinning to full on hysterics.

It only seems like five minutes ago I was listening to demo bootlegs and going to see them in places like Clwb Ifor Bach, now they are playing major venues, appearing on TV every other time I switch it on and hitting the charts with every wacky single. No wonder then, that the ‘Tour Of Welsh Small Venues’ sold out before you could say ‘tidy like’.

The venue was filled with (snob alert) people who had probably never heard of Clwb Ifor Bach and probably did not understand what half the lyrics were about. Many of the crowd were on the youthful side, so much so that you could not buy more than one drink at the bar in case it was going to an under 18.

When they came on, the crowd went mad, and justly so, they played the best set I have ever seen them do. The venue had a lot to do with it, the early gigs were a bit mad because there were so many people rammed into little clubs, then very quickly they were playing to huge festivals and the intimacy was lost a bit. But this was just right, about 800 people in a nice size venue; it was particularly odd because normally the sound upstairs in the ‘stute is usually crap, but tonight it was spot on.

As the band bumped and grinded on stage, hundreds grooved and sweated and dozens clicked away taking photos and even videos with their mobile phones. What a mad world we live in. But it gets madder, when they played the new single R'n B, they were recording it live so people could download it as a ring tone the following morning!!!!

There were quite a few old friends there and we all grinned and chuckled our way through the set, then headed for home not sure if we had been to a gig or been to a pantomime.
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